Brita H.
(Alias “Paper Doll")

The world of fashion design will never be the same now that Brita H. has loosed her considerable talents in that area. In just one year, she has undoubtedly become the highest paid and most respected designer for women's clothing in the world, and of course she is even often seen modeling her own creations as well. The question arises, where did she come from? We are here to answer that question.

Brita has risen to where she is at present, at least in part, by standing on the mighty shoulders of the incredible, Legendary Mr. Christopherson, who taught the Creative Expressions class she attended not long ago. This great teacher noticed her burgeoning potential as she was cutting out and pasting together paper dolls in class one day. You see, she was not content to merely cut out the dolls and then color them, but she went to the additional trouble of also designing and cutting out paper clothing and accessories with which to doll up her dolls. The entire class soon admired her efforts and would often ask her to draw up her special brand of attire for their own paper dolls. Her designs became the most sought after in the whole school, which was already quite well known for the high quality of its paper doll outfits.

The big step came when one of her close friends begged and pleaded with her to design an actual dress that she herself could wear. Perhaps you remember seeing the result on the front page of your local newspaper-‑the astounding story was picked up by the press all over the country. The first “Brita-Dress” began as one rather large piece of construction paper which was folded in the middle across its shorter dimension. Then a head hole was cut out and the garment was worn like a serape. Since the prototype dress proved to be too drafty along the sides, our young genius designer craftily hooked front and back together with staples (after trying and rejecting the more obvious first choice of paper clips, since they tended to slip off too easily). All went well with her first public showing of her new creation until, with the press cameras standing by, it began raining in the parking lot where the fashion show was being staged. As those terrible photos showed, the dress proved not to be waterproof, forcing Brita into a total redesign effort, seeking a new kind of inexpensive waterproof paper.

Finally, with all the wrinkles ironed out of her design, she began producing and marketing the “Brita-Dress-Kit," with which any woman (or even young girl) could construct her own new, fashionable dress using only a pair of scissors and a stapler. This kit changed the world of fashion almost overnight, since the whole thing cost only one dollar (scissors and stapler not included). Her dresses became known as the first truly disposable garment, and trash cans world‑wide were filled to overflowing with them.

Next, young Brita began experimenting with various materials that could be used to decorate the “Brita-Dress.” Soon she flooded the market, beating all the competition yet again, with her color crayon kits--and the even more subtle, colored pencil kits.

She quickly followed up this achievement with the soon‑to‑become‑indis­pensable roll of Scotch tape with which one could, again using her inexpensive “Tape‑On-Kit,” attach virtually anywhere on the dress all sorts of beautiful and wondrous objects. Brita design enthusiasts quickly became the talk of the town as their individual creative minds were reflected on their very own wear­ing apparel.

This genius' latest knockout design effort features an entire line of paper undergarments for both men and women (it seems the male half of the world had been watching jealously while the female half was reaping all the benefits of paper clothing, and they had begun clamoring for their own line of Brita disposable paper wear).

What's next? Well, who can be sure, when we're dealing with such an incredibly gifted designer, but word has it that our young lady has been buying up stock in one of the country's largest pasta manufacturing companies. Could it be that she is finally about to answer the public outcry for a new kind of inex­pensive, boil-to-fit, pair of edible jeans?