Derek Roe
(Alias "Tall-Tail")

We are pleased to announce that K‑Mart Publishing has just come out with the latest in a long series of action novels by that prolific author, Mr. Derek R. As is the case with all of his other books, the idea for this newest thriller, I'll Blow Your House Away, comes from bits and pieces of stories and memories pulled up from his youthful days in the Parkland, Washington area.

This young writer had experienced a frustrating writer's block until that fateful fall of 1993 when he chanced to take the stimulating Creative Expressions class offered by the Legendary Mr. Christopherson, who as it happens, is a writer of note, having produced three to four hundred works of fiction under various pseudonyms, and at least as many writings of a factual nature, many of which are still regarded as the definitive works in their subject areas.

The Legendary Mr. Christopherson recognized in Derek a great desire to tell stories in writing and began to encourage him to do just that. It turns out that the main problem (the block) that young Derek had experienced was due to the difficulty of coming up with a story line, or plot. So the visionary teacher suggested that the boy should think about stories he had already read and then write a completely new story, retaining only the skeletal outlines of the old plot. This method is commonly used by authors, the distinguished educator assured him, and in fact was the secret of success behind the majority of his own published works of fiction. As the famous instructor put it, "When you come across some one's successful plot, why monkey around with attempts to improve upon it; just write the story over again using new characters, and the reading public will love it."

So young Derek picked his current favorite story, "Little Red Riding Hood," as a model for his own first action‑packed novel, Red’s Blood in the Neighborhood. (The story, written that fall in the Creative Expressions class was so well done that it was picked up by K‑Mart Publishing at first reading and became just the start of a series of successful adventure yarns spun out by this talented young author.) The book tells the story of Little Red, a girl of twelve who lived in abject poverty in the Tacoma, Washington area. On her way to visit a distant relative one day, she encountered the neighborhood bully who demanded that she turn over to him the sack lunch she carried. She protested, but the bully, coincidentally named Big Red, was persistent, and began following her along the streets, shouting insulting remarks at her. Finally, having had enough of this, she flagged down a passing police car. After explaining her problem, the officers drew their guns and splattered Big Red all over the neighborhood, putting an end to his bullying, and providing a nice moral for the story: do not insult little girls carrying a sack lunch!

This greatly successful book was followed by The Environmentalist and the Frog, which tells the tale of a young man who fell in love with a frog‑like swamp creature which had been created accidentally by Tacoma-area industrial pollution. After a long struggle against the polluting businesses, during which said businesses  insisted he must get his frog‑like lover to retrieve some 2,400 golf balls from the swamp she lived in, the young man found that he could restrain himself no longer. He ended up kissing the pretty young frog‑like creature, where after he lost his balance and toppled into the foul swamp himself. He quickly turned into a frog‑like creature too, and they, now two of a kind, lived happily ever after, selling retrieved golf balls back to the clubhouses of three nearby greens.

One story followed another as Mr. R. got into the swing of it. Drawing upon the stories of his youth, he has made a highly successful career out of his writing. His latest book is no doubt destined to be a big hit, along with all the others. The story involves three young, chubby brothers who have each built themselves new houses, one of straw, one of wood, and the last, of brick. The property tax collector turns out to be the bad guy in this book. We reluctantly have decided to tell no more about this latest story, for fear of giving away too much of the plot. So we leave it up to you, the reading public, to get a copy of Derek R.'s new book at your local K‑Mart and settle in for yet another fifteen minutes or so's reading pleasure which will keep you on the edge of your seat!